Tuesday

What I’ve always wanted is to have a surprise birthday party.

I had one when I was younger with my friends Ben and Alex, and it was great, don’t get me wrong, but the one I’ve always imagined is one where a bunch of people are there. I’ll walk up the stairs one day, slowly and quietly, I’ll hear a noise, a quite muffled laugh followed by a shush. I’ll stop on the stairs and listen, and then I’ll smile, realizing what’s going on.

I open the door slowly and inside is everyone I know and care about. They all stand up and shout “SURPRISE!” and I laugh and act surprised. I can’t stop smiling now. People are coming up to me and giving me hugs and telling me how happy they are for me. I don’t know what to say after a while, all I can do is smile because it all just seems surreal.

Hanging under the rafters are strings of those Japanese lights. You don’t remember do you? Your mother bought them for that party she had last summer at the lake house. In the corner of the room the record player plays slowly. “This Must Be the Place” comes on and someone turns it up. It’s loud now and everyone begins dancing. We’re swapping dance partners and everyone is laughing. Everyone is just so happy to be here, together. I turn and watch you out of the corner of my eye. You spin in and out, your hair covering your face, and I catch a slight smile on your lips.

The song ends and I make my way onto the roof. It’s cold and I can see the faint glimmer of stars above the glow of the city lights. “Canadian Girl” plays loudly downstairs. I close my eyes and take it all in. It all seems so surreal.

Sunday

It’s cold and the fluorescent lights reflect on the linoleum floor.

When you walk in the doors just keep walking straight, and to your right there will be an advertisement. It’s nothing you would notice unless you turned and looked directly at it. It’s for Converse and in it is a picture of a girl with really light blonde hair with a grey dress on and she’s holding a basketball in her hands as she laughs. It’s as though someone just out of eye sight tossed her the ball and she caught it just in time. She turns and laughs and, just then, the picture is taken.

I carry a walkie talkie when I’m at work. I pick it up when I walk in and carry it in my pocket all day. Throughout the day I hear people asking where items are or calling for help at the checkouts. It’s nothing that you would notice, just a steady noise I listen to as I work.

Every night I turn on the news and fall asleep to the low drone of CNN.

It’s really late at night, well I guess early in the morning, and the TV is still on in my room. It’s the background noise that soothes me. Floating through the air and I half listen as I close my eyes.

She’s wearing grey and she’s facing the other direction. The sun is shining and it’s so bright I have to squint my eyes. Where are those glasses she always wears? Never mind.

Hey Emma think fast!

I toss the ball lightly, making sure it arches in the air. She turns and catches the ball before it hits the ground, and then she begins to laugh.